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The Parrsitivity Podcast
The Parrsitivity Podcast

Episode 2 · 2 years ago

The Parrsitivity Podcast #Episode 100 ft special guest Dr. Robb Kelly, PHD

ABOUT THIS EPISODE

In this episode I welcome you Dr. Robb Kelly, PHD - Robb Kelly is a certified life coach - Certified NLP Practitioner - Nationally certified recovery coach - Author of: Daddy daddy please stop drinking - Dr. Robb Kelly, PHD tells his story in this podcast about the battle that he had with alcoholism, the trials and tribulations that he faced along the way, and how he turned his life around. Robb Kelly now helps people to recover from alcohol and drug addictions. He is the CEO of @robbkellyrecoverygroup which helps people to reclaim back there lives, Eminem was one of many people to go through this recovery program! Robb Kelly has appeared on the US TV show The doctors, appeared on many radio shows and Podcasts! - I am very humbled to have Robb Kelly on this podcast, I really that you take something positive from this. - Website: https://www.robbkelly.com/ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/dr-robb-kelly-07718133 --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/the-parrsitivity-podcast/message

Hither. My name is Adam Po and the podcast host posity to podcast. In this podcast, you will be listened to me connect with people from different walks of life, from the military to people in the music industry, to people in the self help industry and many other areas of life. In this podcast I'll be talking about topics from self help, mental health, motivation, spirituality, mindset, society, current affairs and much, much more. If you enjoy this podcast, please subscribe, share and let me know your feedback. And my main intention on this podcast is to have a positive impact for you, the lit the listener, to take something positive from it, to apply something positive into your life from this. Now with without further ado, let's go to podcast and enjoy. Hi and welcome to the parties of PODCAST. On this episode of I have a special guest, Dr Rob Kelly. Dr Rob Kelly is a recovered alcoholic. He now helps people with addictions in drugs and alcohol through his Recovery Program Dr Rob Kelly Recovery Group. Dr Rob Kelly has a PhD in psychology for the Oxygen Oxford University and nationally certified recovery coach as well. He is also a certified and LP practitioner, certified life coach, has been featured on many podcasts, radio shows and TV programs from the doctors. He's also the author of Daddy, Daddy, stop drinking. In this podcast we talked about the journey that rob was on whilst he was an alcoholic and the challenges that you faced, and we was talk about the work that he does now in helping people to recover and regain normality in their lives. He's also helped people from the likes of Eminem through his program, Recovery Program. I'm very, very humbled and grateful and honored to have Dr Rob Kelly on this podcast episode. Please, please, please, go and check out his work and his content and I think, you know, this episode is really, really inspiring, motivating and powerful and I think you can really take something from this. So please share this to anyone that might be, you know, suffering. Now, sit back, relax and enjoy this episode. Right. Hi, I like doing thank you for you on the...

...podcast. I'm pleasure, Adam, good to be here. Be a good, good, good play minutes. Yeah, not exactly now. It is good to have you on and I see that you done lots of different things, like your certified life coach and I'll be practitioner. Or you've got a past working out bureau studios and you help people, you know, recover, you know, through the addictions. Yeah, I've I've got a PhD and psychology and a PhD be able to science. So I study behind of Science and addiction. As to the alcoholic addictive brain, I started drink at the age of nine and it was it was a long battle for me. So that's why I've got into all this stuff. So I camera studied the brain for twenty seven years. There's not a little bit, a lot, not a lot of studying going on in the brain when it comes to alcoholism. So I think everything have been through and everything I've achieved in my life, the one thing that I couldn't get over as Alcoholis if he keeps knocking me on my house every time, it's couldn't. I can't understand it. So that's what got me into it. Plus I suffered really bad. I mean I stopped off in my schooling and through university. I went to Xi University and then I was as session musician, still drinking and using, and finally, about the age of Twenty Six, twenty seven, finally lost everything, lost my kids, wives, houses, cars and end up on the streets, homeless. It was a it was horrendous. It really was crazy. Yes, it's. It's crazy, like how you said about how will that, you know, spiraled and you had everything and then you ended up Blo you know, losing it through through, like you know, the alcoholism, and like I think, like you said that as well, like that's something you know that needs to be locked eyesn't it? I think, like you know, the brain, I said the brain side of it. Yeah, definitely. I mean, we're not look at an alcoholism. It's not. It's not the alcohol and it's not it's not something that you can just pick up. Alcoholism and mental health something that you're born with. Alcoholisms, your bomb with alcoholism or the alcoholic brain, and what happens in the childhood, with the trauma and the remapping of the early brain, defines the future. So what happens is when we pick outcohol and it becomes a comfort blanket and then we kind of rely on that and if you have alcoholic tendencies, then it becomes more and more prevalent in life and before you unite day is it's the number one thing that you want to do every single day. Don't they can stop you. I mean's just it's a crazy disease that's very misunderstood, because I'll watching one your clips when you was on the doctors, that program, and you said that the realization of view is when you went to buy it and then you like your kind of froze and you notice like you knows your your mindset. Yeah, and that was a big changer for me because I've been somewhere alcoholic. was always for us on alcohol being the problem, and alcohol is not the problem. Alcohol is the is the solution to begin with, and then it's just a by product of the actual mental, I don't like to say mental injury as an I say mental injury. So it was a by product of that. So you need to really understand what an alcoholic brain does. And that was one of my moments where I was grabbing the bottle around my body started to calm down as fact, to stop sweating, and then before another day was I was feeling pretty cool and the kettle still on the bottom. So I knew that more studying was needed to better understand the alcoholic brain if we're going to move forward. With the disease.

Yeah, but I think that you said that's what people is. It's like people's go to, isn't it? It's almost automatic, like if someone's feeling not okay or the field upset or something has happened. People always think I each other, drink just to calm myself down and distress, and I think like it's that switch, isn't it? Yeah, any times, especially if you are alcohol intendencies, it will, it will take into excess. But yeah, it was. Any different comes along, that is, is any any worrying, any nervous, any change, any treat we will go to alcohol every time to cut like the state, to calm down in the beginning. But as alcoholism takes off, as it did with me, what you find is you find you count control your intake of alcohol and then after a few months or years, you find out you cannot stop being take. So towards the end of my drinking, I said the last four years before I came home, as I didn't drink to get drunk, I drank to feel normal, and that's the difference that people don't understand. I mean alcoholics like me. We don't drink every day to get drunk. We just drink every day to try and feel normal and survived. You know, I couldn't function without drinking half a bottle of vodka. I just couldn't do it. I couldn't get out of bed. I was shaken too much, my head was banging and vomiting. And then drink half a bottle of vodka and I could just I could get up and get shown able to work. And this is what field understand. And look at the high level, when I played that every road and playing with queen out and join David Bowie and playing with all these guys, everything I've done, it's been an excess of that, the best around. So when you took a high achiever like me and a high performer, it'd be crazy to say that an alcohol can take me down. But he did and I lost everything. They took my licenses off me, that driving Li stuff made, they took my houses, cars, kids, everything. He took up me and I'm living on the street, still drinking. Still didn't think out a problem and he just wont went right and he happened very, very quick out of again. Happen overnight, you know, happened over and so it happened wrong down happen is literally all the night. For me. It's a matter of two or three months and everything was done that I work for millions of dollars and cars and hows he is and porsches and Bentley's and, you know, role let's watches, and it was all gone within three to six months. Gone have anything so so like twenty five grand role lets watches for six more dollars to get there, and fender telecaster guitars signed by Eric Clapton for like sixty because I want to draw. Because crazy, very, very crazy. Never want to go back there again. Yeah, that's insane. Like, you know, to think about that. It's like when you know when you was in it, I suppose you're you're just like looking for that necks like fix and you know that drink and you know you're not aware of foremost what you do at the time. You're just so folks on that that thing. Yeah, something that that's what that's what got me, because it's just the alcohol seems good at the beginning with. It was like this is great, I can really perform well here, and then it kind of take all your slowly and then before you know it, days you can't even function without it. And then you've done I mean you, I mean you're going to die. All get lots couping inside. I want to Gout and kill somebody just sort of dropped me off. I fact to stand my wife three times one night because you let me fairy drinking. And now I gotten a play. Went to Spain and it wasn't let me on the plane, but I told him I was some famous footballers on color something and let me on the plane absolutely blind drunk. Otherwise, if he had to let me on the plane that I got arrested and I probably studying side by now. But a time gone to Spain, she hung down,...

...they got back in, I see you in the emerging room. And then, yeah, she wouldn't press charges. So I came back to England. And otherwise, ever did lon sort some crazy Jesus, because it's like you just on that that you know, that that one laying almost like you know, use that tunnel vision. You just like you not look at anything else that's happening, just next thing next. So like do do you think as well, because it was around, you know, music stars and people in the Rock and roll industry, do you think that added to it in some way because they there was, you know, a was they doing drink or things, you know. So you're right in that kind of see it on you. So like yeah, death, it contributed like a hundred percent because everybody was on stuff and everybody was drinking like crazy. I've been going back after a session happy roll to helping John's hotel, which was the Savoyor tell in London, when the pent house suite and when we're doing coking and drinking everything, it's like the like and better than this, you know. And then I thought I was going to be there first of my life. I thought was going to hang around stars and become a multi millionaire and just be a pop star and it's just amazing and all the sudden everything starting to come away and Jesus, it's it's like that that high, isn't it? And the things people, you know, you see and in movies, you know that are the warf all street people are. You know. I was reaching for that high and then there's that come down, isn't the people that you know wants to go back to the acorn that like on the hamster will kind offense. Yeah, even if you know that it's going to kill you, because I died twice on the streets and they brought me back. I transmit suicide six times and twice the actually my heart stops and I died in the streets, but when I came around, they come to hospital. Obviously in the site world, in Mental Hospital. As soon as I come out, went street drinking and quite well when it was check. It's that I just like going to Hans feel like you say, and you know there's not getting nothing from me. I I made my mind up and come to peace with the fact that the din the streets. I had no problems. We died. I tried to jump off buildings drunk and fell along. My fell back was it's thowing forward. I jumped in front of a train and some, some two guys jumped on the truck and pull me off. It's just crazy that the things I did and the scripts are got into. I tied myself to a train drive once and as a train comes towards it, took a different round and I'm left tight to this fridging train joy in the rain. It's just laughable. But I didn't want to live. What to die? To Die? Yeah, horrible and I think like it's amazing what you've done to in your life around you know from all those things I've happened to get, you know, to get on the Shrewnd Nour and to be health. People who've been in, you know, once in your shoes in the past of an US gets, you know, really inspiring and motivating, an amazing I think. And then anybody's up those struggling and anybody's out there in my position, not depressed or bipolar or all in life, I'm going to get bays. Always Yourself. A couple of questions. First of all, have about you want to improve your life? How about you want to do it? But if you really want to improve your life, anybody can do it, anybody can improve on anybody can be whatever they want to be. It's all in the mind. If you can visualize it in your mind, you can hold it in the hand. People that realize it's now powerful the brain is, and how powerful that once we realize who we are as individuals, how much power we actually have a human beings, and we use that power. So if I wanted to be the best, I don't know, the best counsel in the world, the best soccer player, football player, and he. You put your mind to it and you go about it and you don't let anything else Colt you and you can improve, and that's what I did. My dream was to come to America, be a TV star and be a millionaire drive. I'm sad this McLaren, living a million dollar house...

...and work online for the rest of my life, and all that's come true. I do. All that was come true. I do driver the Saint of McLaren. I do it in other house. I have them something millionaire. You know all these things have come true. You've got to watch it. I didn't know. That's all it is. People don't think that I could never be that. Bullshit. You could be anybody you want to be. You could be ricked or as poor as you want to be. I was happy. decided you want to be it. Just got to put your night Toi and go. You know something, the guy that's already there doing that job, living that life, dating that girl, driving that car, is no better than the game. Wanted to do it. He just he has a better design than you at all. It's me wants it work more than you want it. It's not. There's no reason why you can't achieve these dreams. Guys, it's just it's possible. It's how the Stop saying it's impossible and sticking apostrophe in there and say I'm possible. Stop saying nothing's impossible. Yeah, yeah, no, I completely agree with you, rob and I think, like you know what you said, that you know is possible. I think, like like you said, you know you can't. You know, turned your life around, and that's you know, when you think all those events and those things are happen. You know, some people just think, you know, you know, it's not possible to get out of something like that. Like you said, it is and that you know, that's through choice. And I think people so caught up in that victim mode and there they're, they're playing on this story of why they are who they are and there's all these you know, like a blueprint almost. Yeah, you know, you said, if you really want it, it's there for you. You just got to put the work in. And, like they said, you know, you you've got these things that your manifested, you know, taught you know, time ago, and you know your products of that in your work for that and it comes to fruition. Will come to fruition. Every single time. Whether it's a big thing you want are a small thing you makes no difference. It's like you know, you see someone driving that nice being or something. Thats way. It kind of that making plan, visualize happen. It's just like people already there don't want to know this. People are successful don't really want any wids. Know that being successful, but nothing to do with our clever you are. What universe do you want to what you cooking? IQ is but nothing to do with that. He's changing chances. People today, in today's world, don't take chances. You make practical decisions based on fear. So that that fair and the life. I'm going to think so now. They makes so much sense and will surprise people. Some of the biggest multimillionaires are billionaires in the world. Don't own anything. Amazon don't only stuck and B and B don't own any houses. Uber don't own any cars. It's just a matter of getting into a place where you you can succeed and become that person and once you've better than the person next to you. Yeah, and that's a fine point. I think, like you said, that you know Uber and you know being bet. They didn't. They don't own the things that you know, they that that you know we are within their product. It's like, you know that that pattern of thinkers in our mindset. It's like if you see a nice car, it's like some people think, I can't afford that, and that's how we yeah, okay, you can't afford that. Flip it around say, you know, one day I'll have and I think it's we can be wired to be negative sometimes, or we pick up on things in the past or what people beliefs, from what people say to us, and then we, you know, we we just consume all this negativity from people and things and there's limited beliefs, you know, from the past. And Yeah, no, I completely agree with you. I think. I think as...

...well with what you're doing. Like what? What? What? What is the starting point for someone who is addicted or, you know, stuck it without alcoholism? You know because you have a program and of course I suppose, yes, we do, and you know you can call those or look me up on line. Well, heavy through that. What caught? Talk to somebody, if you'll. If you think Jo many drugs and it's and it's not weekend only, it's during the week, or you drinking during the week and every day or he's been drinking. Talk to somebody. That's the that's the first step is talked to somebody and see if you have a really problem. There's a big difference between some guy who goes out on a Friday and sat the night and gets from wasted and someone who goes out and drinks alcoholically on a Friday sapping something that there's a big difference and you just have to realize the difference. So get help. Think somebody, talk towards call as a will ask you a few questions and then you can self diagnose yourself if you need help. But there's always help out there and don't be embarrassed, don't be full of feel no, I don't want to get on because if anybody finds out, it's like most most of the successful people that you see out there include in soccer players, football players, rugby players, business owners, are alcoholics. They just don't tell everybody. But the addictive alcoholic brain is the smartest brain in the world and once we come up alcohol and drugs and redirect it into business, going to sport, or into women or boy whoever it is, then we become absolutely amazing at that topic. So if you are struggling, don't think it's all crapping, that this is all bad near it's not. It's good news. I seen so many people succeed. The addig you brain will get what the addicted brain wants and right now, if you're struggling, it wants alcohol, drugs. You can change that around and guarantee you can change that around, a hundred percent guarantee you can change that around. Yeah, Nice, exactly. Yea, and the slide. I've worked in a sidety for like many years, you know, hotels and restaurants, and the men, the must of people I've worked with, like chefs or managers, who are you knocking it back a lot, you know, whilst they're working. Sometimes I remember had a manager and he was drinking coke, dark coke, and he was like it's I'm was shaking with was drinking it. I was looking at him and I does a stuff. I was asked not just can hear. It was rum and coke. is knocking back double rooms and coke a like twelve o'clock in the day because, you know, it's such a stressful industry. A lot of people, you know, taking drugs and drinks and it's crazy to wit. It's like the matter stuff we had come and go, you know, and it was all down to drinking and drugs and I was like there's got to be something, you know, breaking point was somewhere where these people reach out for help. But it's got you. Would you say? It's got to ultimately come from that person. They've got to want to change home of present. Yeah, nobody can change for me. Know, we can get you to change. Nobody can lead you to change. You just you. You got to get it one day and you can have happen and have enough crap. You know, I want better in my life now. If you're another a chance day of the disease, not good sizes of drag during the silt of them driving drunk and cattle leaving a chip for panel, whatever it may be. There's a high chance. If you get one more, you go that say I want to change and stick of this. I'm stick of his life, you know, stick and getting up, feeling, getting out see what we have to say. You're not a bad person trying to be good. You're a sick person who needs to get well, and that's the difference. And if and if you want to take that step naked today, you know, just get it a try today. And if you think you've got to, if you think you've got a problem with alcohol the drugs and you're not sure, so you don't want to see calvincates, you embalance yourself. Try Coming after for a month. Don't touch anything for a month. If you can do it, you stand a pretty good chance of being okay. But if you can't, you find you some drinking or using drugs during that month, then you're probably got you probably got a problem. Yeah, it most it must feel very rewarding, you know, seeing people go for your program can see...

...people develop and grow and change. You know, yeah, definitely is. Are you were not some of the biggest stars in the world, Robbie Downey Jr, and then they're all my guys. They all came to me for help and the help come through it. So when you see them, guys go back and record albums and you know, Robert goes back in May, one of the biggest movers in his life, and all the other guys that they come here, then you know that we're doing something right and it is very, very rewardants. No doubt that. Yeah, now. So I mean that often us. One of the crazy things in that you see lot of se successful people, you know, who actors, movie stars, and you've never thought that they would have been, you know, in that place. You know, exam murger. The crazy thing is, and here's wherever it starts to freak out, is everybody's going to addiction. Everybody has going to addiction. So it's about finding your addiction and then then you have to deciders a good addiction of addiction and any addiction to the extreme, Diet, in the gym, wherever it is, any addiction to the extreme is harmful in some way and you have to you have the way up the harm against the negative, against the positive of what you're doing with addiction. So if you're going to the gym every day and died in every day, do you have a problem with eating camel, problem with, you know, also some eating disease that come on? So be healthfully doing its great. You know, everybody as something that they all ver exerting. Every any single one of us had that. We need to look at that. You know, I'm not specially have an addiction. Is just that some addiction shown more than others and my friend goes to the gym, he goes everything on day and you can't miss it. Nobody says a word about I go out and drinking it, a caught, have it get locked up and spend twenty grand on a bend or something and goes crazy. For me, it's like soy, take good addiction to a bad you know. HMM. Yeah, no, I care, like I think it's being having that self awareness, isn't it? Then just kind of like looking at the things that you do. I mean I used to drink a lot of coffee. I wanted to have a drinking a lot of coffee. So I like it and it's addictive. When I was working in hotels and I was having some days for four to five and then I was like now I'll have probably one or two. I mean I had one that, but I've been aware of that and you know I'll work out. But I love rest. It's like you said, they were good and bad, like addictions, and I think you have all got that one thing that we like to do. Yeah, which would you recommend any like books or anything like that, but you you like and as amazing buck out there calls Daddy Daddy, please stop drinking. It's my book and I'm sure it's. Yeah, you go to Amazon, and I mean I only say this because we're not wear anything off and every every day, I be penny whenever you'm in. The world, goes to back into the community, goes back to people, but it's Daddy, Daddy, please stop drinking it on Amazon, just going there. Put My name in. I'll put the tag of the book in it comes. It's a great read. It talked about addiction, but most of all he taught and gives a nice to people who, whatever the suckceeding life of how to go about it and give some good mental tools and mental tips on how you can get there to a place where nobody can stop it. And there's millions of people doing this on a daily basis. You know, when I come across it, didn't believe. I'm easy. Always want to start to believe in myself. Yeah, not sucklear Roban, I mean like, I think it's really inspire what you're doing. You know, it's really, really positive and as really, you know, powerful. You know, because because people hope, I mean because lots of people out there who, I think, especially through covid people, have probably...

...been drinking more, you know, through stress. Yeah, alcohol sales in take us alone. I've got to buy thirty six percent in the last three months. So I give you an idea of what it's all about. So, yeah, yeah, no, I. I. I applaud you for, you know, for the work that you do, and you know I've really, really appreciate you come on to my podcast and talking about your experiences and, you know, the the issues around alcoholism and drugs. My pleasure. Absolutely. It's always good to inform people. If you need any more to come to the website. Guys ropingcom. Well, we'll give you some information. If you're not sure what no, matter where you are in the world, what's up? How number we'll talk to you, will give you some an I be pushing for you here and my cheam you and if you really want to speak to me, just tell them you get put through to me. I'll speak to you. Will cust you anything, just for guys with this podcast and listen to it. Yeah, get in touch. Let's get you from how it's getting the right direction, get your life back. Yeah, now, certainly, certainly wrong, not, but I'll definitely, I'll definitely put your details and your links, because you've got you got lots of your lots of Youtube links to interviews you've had and shows that you've been on a radio. Yes, so I'll put your details in there for you. Excellent, sounds good. Thank you, funk. You off for the child. Really really appreciate you. Being a podcasts and really means a lot and I think you're do an amazing in your work. Thank you. I don't really appreciate it's great to be unable to do again real soon. Yeah, of course. All right, buddy checks right, guys. Yeah, you too, take care of cheers, Rob Bib one. Cheers well.

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