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The Parrsitivity Podcast
The Parrsitivity Podcast

Episode 35 · 1 year ago

The Parrsitivity Podcast #Episode 67 Jara McConnell

ABOUT THIS EPISODE

In today's episode I'm joined with Jara McConnell, Jara is a jewellery designer that makes beautiful handmade and personalised jambala's, necklace's, bracelet's! INSTAGRAM: @Jaramcconell website: https://www.etsy.com/uk/listing/766493263/leather-wrap-bracelet?ref=shop_home_active_10 --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/the-parrsitivity-podcast/message

Hither. My name is Adam Po and the podcast host posity to podcast. In this podcast, you will be listened to me connect with people from different walks of life, from the military to people in the music industry, to people in the self help industry and many other areas of life. In this podcast I'll be talking about topics from self help, mental health, motivation, spirituality, mindset, society, current affairs and much, much more. If you enjoy this podcast, please subscribe, share and let me know your feedback. And my main intention on this podcast is to have a positive impact for you, the lit the listener, to take something positive from it, to apply something positive into your life from this. Now with without further ado, let's go to podcast and enjoy. Hi, and what came supports is a podcast. In this episode I'm with Jare McConnell. She's a jewelry designer that makes Chambala's bracelets, necklaces, ear rings and much more. In this podcast we talked about genres journey, which is a really, really motivational, inspiring story about how she got into making jewelry and her life changing experiences around it. I'm really humble to have Jara on the podcast now. Hope you enjoyed this episode. Now sit back, relax enjoy this podcast. Hi, so in the first bit of the podcast the connection broke off with the ANC platform and I couldn't reconnect with you. So I had to reconnect with her via a video call on instagram. So we kind of go straight into how she got into what she does. Enjoy scholarships and two years experience. So I...

...think it was nine. I searchers nine, or can I searchers the big six? My left eye and it didn't come back, and so I don't have any issue in my left eye. And then you fat forward, you know, newly divorced, two children, three jobs, like at a full time job and two part time jobs, and I was getting my hair done and all of a sudden I couldn't see the same way that I couldn't see what I was punched, but I had no traumas in my eyes. So immediately I go to the doctor and she says, yes, you have a detached right that and it's different. It's like I had lighting straps like two or three times in me and she said that I had older person's, like eighty year old eye. And what happens is is that it's De generitive, and so it was putting holes. Every time I was the leak, it would rip pulls in my right Oh my God, so slowly I didn't realize it because it's not in the front of my eye. Right, I can't see it because it's not in the side of my business. So she goes, there's so many holes in your eye, I can account. So at this point now I'm completely blind, two children and newly divorced. No help. My Dad has to move in with me to help take care of my kids, take into school and help me for tooth right because I can't work im face down and literally it's just black, you know. So I navigated through that for like nine months and I it was just a really interesting organic time for me because I didn't panic. It was one of those things where there's so many times in my life where it's uncertain and we don't know, we don't have control over it. We're so we're not proactive about it right, we're just reactionary, to assistance, to Suation, and so anyway, so slowly but surely I healed. But the realb of that was I couldn't go back to teach. I've in the middle of getting my masters at the time. So now I'm blind and I have to navigate through technology to help me see, and that was really, really hard. inters. You have to be so patients. And when you have a mouth that reads everything, when I say it reads everything, we're talking like backslash, backlash, Michael, and that's what it reads to you. So your brain scans so much, you know what I mean, with your eyes, that we don't read right. You just scan without the ability with your vision makes it really hard. So I had a decision to me where. One I couldn't go back to school, I couldn't, I couldn't provide for my family. That's all I knew. So I started my friends that you need to make the Malla and I was reading Catholic and believed in God, and she because I know you believe in God, out but I really want you to try to meditate and to see what that looks like. And they said, but, and she goes, well, I want you to make your own and I said, you know how tiny a hole is to put a string through a bead. You know to mean and your your blind. And so I thought about my mantra, mantra is something they can put into the Mallaby's a bettan prayer netlice. That, as a hundred eight, means. And then it has a good movies where all the prayers and your intentions for your mantra goes and as you wear it, it manifest that intention or that prayer that you're trying to put out the world and you're bringing it back to your tract in it like light, attractive, like and so I did it. It's just be...

...like three months to make the smalla and it has not. They were tight to know the hot mess, but it was mine and I made it. And every surgery I went through, my Monstra was love and wellness, like I am well, I am love. And for me, my perception, my perspective of what it meant. It wasn't gift. I was going to get my sight back right, it was went like, I'm fucking getting my sight back and I'm going to will myself to see it, you know, to mean like I know whether towards or I resigned in myself. If I'm going to be blind, let's do this right. So the last, the last eye surgery, she says, listen, I'm not going to do searcher anymore. Your vision does not come back after this surgery that they and I said, okay, but your face with is it's going to happen. If not, let's see what it looks like to be wine. So the Center for the blind was prepared to come into my house. They were going to take my licens and I couldn't drive and I said please test me one more time. So they have to do this like pressure test and all this kind of stuff, and she says no, there's nothing. And the next time they did it there was like a pen hole of light and I could see my daughter standing there just a little bit, you know what I mean. But it was something. It was something other than black right, because for so long and you have to keep your head down and I felt like a wounded animal. I'm a very confident try first, you know, I'm I'm not shot what I mean. And and so when you when you have a to touch that me, you have to have your face down right, because gravity is going to heal your your eyes. What's going to help you your eyes? You have to be faced down and having the weight of that try to heal your eye. So organically I started making other Molis once by fishing, slowly but surely, came back. And you have to remember too, during this time and I couldn't worry about me. Like to me, they were just bet they weren't the most important thing of what's going on, what's going on in my life, my house, with port closer, I couldn't pay my boat. I made six center thirty dollars a month to it. You know what I mean. And so that was really, you know, scary, but you have to like what you know what I mean. It's not like I could do anything different. I couldn't work out any better, I could eat any better. I just had to wait and set those intentions and really be positive, and so it all work out. But I, you know, I didn't go back to school to work. I started. My friends, like you know, want you start selling your raceless at the farmer smoke and I said I don't think I could do that. It's a very spiritual thing for me and I love what I do. Love that I can bring just a little bit of joy to somebody with my piece and grain. And so I set up a table and it was like maybe a dinner to table. You know, I had ten bracelets and four balls that I made all salt problem and I gave them all the way, it run across people that are like this is so great and you think yourself one of small compan that I do or somebody that brings and joy. But it's not like I was bringing the children joy, and I think that's what bothered. Means that I was really good at my job. I took on the hard kids, I took on the kids that nobody wanted and really be herely challenge. So I felt like I was doing that community. I wasn't helping them anymore right, but now I found myself a different way of helping other people and bringing them joy in a different way, if that makes it so. Two weeks later, after I set up my food my boyfriend runs the farmers market and we start dating. Any because you know what Jerry go stopt been doing...

...this seventeen years and he says you never know who's going to walk around this morning. You may look at somebody and they may look like to have no money and they maybe the people that buy ten pieces for or the people that look, you know, like they got it together and they're they're not interested in your pieces. You know what I mean they're not interested in your story or whatever it is, or you bringing and joy. So for me, connecting with people, like you say, and listening to the stories and turning my pieces into a story that helps them was Priceles for me. And so I'm standing there and I'm making lava, braceless rice. You can put the viewsers on you put oils on them, essential oils and the like. Guy. And so this guy comes up and he's from Australia and he's gone an accident and he's except like seven of the races because we're doing this. And I was like, well, that's awesome, you know, and he goes, how much are they? And I call them and he says, well, I'd like to take these and I said okay, and I start kind of telling you my story and he is like in awe of my stories and what it meant for me to get where I was. That it was really interested in the designing for him and I just didn't I didn't think about it. I was I don't know how to explain it. It caught me off guard that he was like why won't he a design for us? And you got to remember I have zero design experience, zero education and I had just been making Malla's and things for maybe too much, you know what I mean. And he says I want to amusing, I want to meeting with you, and I said okay, and so it doesn't take the ease and he hands out a credit card and I said, oh no, I could take cash, I take a credit card because I'm so new, I don't even have a credit card machine yet. So he goes, Oh my God, you gotta get a credit card machine, you know. And at this point, like I couldn't afford a laptop, I'm trying to read you my bills. I'm trying to get back into society and trying to get on my own feet, trying to be self sufficient. I had to be a public assistance. I had to beg and I was proud of that, I really was. Those are program that people are almost there and those were things that helps me through a time where I really needed that, the services. And once I didn't need those services, I turned that back in and I said I appreciated thank you, and that's it. You know what'sn't something that I wanted to stay on. I wanted to get back to work so that one on and that's when I took this meeting with him. He is like all the billionaire and he goes, I want to design for my company, and I said the other watches that are made of wood. So like Paul of saying back, they would make feeds and watches. So you would have a part of a holiday wor building or something. Do I mean like whiskey barrels, wine barrels? The NBA National Championship floor, they made watches out of bath so my job was to design races to pair with those watches. And I said gave us so legit. I mean change my life. He walked around the corner. He goes, Jarry, goes, I want to hire you and I want I want to you to design ormus and then you're going to come back and we'll be negotiate. So two weeks in, you know what, I have other jobs right I'm trying to heal. I still have a couple I appoints and still ending. You know my eyes. And so he says, I go to him and I said it. I said you're on the last of the total pole. I don't think I can do this anymore because I don't want to disappoint you, but I also don't want to drop my other respects bids that have right. And he says, I don't think you understand what you're doing, what you're saying to me, and I said,...

...he goes think, so what you need on to not work for those people anymore. I want you to work on the whole time and not have to worry about that. And in my head I'm adding up my book. Yeah, because I'm not a business person, I have no idea what it means to be corporate or have that kind of money. I just I just say is that way, and so I add all my bills. I say sixteen hundred eighty five is what I need to live off us, because that's close us, you know. And he laughed at don't last in a bad way. He was like you need you know, she'll fill your work. And I said I didn't know what a designer made. And so he goes down, I'm gonna, I'm going to write another and I'm going to side it across the table to you. So he did, and the number was sixty five Tho. You got to remember as a teacher I was making nineteenero six hundred. Yeah, with the master's working so when somebody says sixty five dollars, you don't need in my house for closure. So I designed for him and he was round Christmas time. He gives me like to credit cards to these my kids, like five hundred, you know, and I didn't have there. Was it going to be a Christmas that here I was trying to get back into my career, all that stuff. So I designed for them for nine months and the rest of history. And I've separated from that. I have now my own branding, you know, for my for cary young, you know, my pieces, and I learnt so much from that and the kindness that he showed me and the empathy when you're in a position where you feel so vulnerable and yet you never know who's going to walk around the border and change a life. You know what I mean? A tough is that's what I didn't want them too that I was a weak person, that the fear of somebody taking my kids away, that intrinity care of them, and it really taught me perseverance and, you know, I don't know. I feel so grateful to be in the position that I'm to meet other people, to share simple choices in and make one of the piece, you know, pieces for them. So that's that's how I got started. That's what do now. So I just farmers markets that I have three farmers markets that I just total and and on at the shop and trying to convert now that we don't have the farmers markets, trying to earn my energy in my passion online and that's been really tough. But if I can bring, like you say, if I can context with one person and bring value to them and joy to them, it just makes my heart happy, you know. So that's that's such an amazing in sparring motivating, you know, story that you know you have and like that experience that you went through where you couldn't see and you didn't think you would ever see again, and you know, going through that those periods and then, you know, on top of that, like you know, your work and then your house and then the family and, yeah, everything on top of that. It's like so, so crazy, you know, like and, like you said, you came you came around from it. It's almost like a miracle in some sense, isn't? It really was, and I think that's the power of positivity, the power of bringing that attention and understanding and being okay, so I was at a place where I was going to be blind. I'm going to be the...

...best flying person I can be, right, and what that looks like. Let's stop dwelling on not seeing and let's see what it looks like and what skills I need to not see. You know what I mean to tell I thought about and then once I can see, and it just got better from there. I have no peripheral vision, but I least to have this. That there my vision, and then I have blast of the help me see, you know, obviously at night. So it just really copy that life can change on a dime and if you don't have inventory what's important in your life, you need to get it. You need to figure it out, because it's too late when you're reactionary, you know what I mean. There are other choices that are taken away from you and I just didn't want it that happen to me. I wanted to maximize what it meant to be. You know what, you need to have it in front of you. I wanted to maximize my choices and not hold myself and if it wasn't for my Dad, my dad is get like emotional thinking about it, because he put his life on hold and he moved in and he took care of my kids and myself, no questions ask and I just am so grateful. I can't imagine to be in a position where I didn't have that. So I feel so, so lucky. Yeah, it's really that he did that. Yeah, it's movie that he did that as well, and he he steps in on the hope to we've got. You know, that's current situate, in that situation that he was in by it's pretty it's pretty. Yeah, it's it's pretty amazing without going Oh my God. My boyfriend, Regie, he says he and I think he put it so eloquently, he said that when you met Paul, Paul was the name, Paul Us name, when you met him, he goes, I've heard it happened before, right, he goes to one lifetime opportunity, obviously, and you but to see it happened in front of your eyes. He said it was the most lovely thing that he's ever seen. You know I mean, because people have been there from years and have good products, right, and I just farmers market for fifteen, twenty years and nothing comes of it. So he said to watch you go and have a full time job designing by that and watching it happen and all he said, it was just beautiful. So and it just didn't. You just never know. And I think treating people with an authentic kindness when they come across your booth, because you don't know who they are and you don't built their story. And so I think listening to everybody's story and when they listen to my story, because I don't I don't tell people want to be like Oh, I'm sorry, you know what means. I say it to them to give them a sense of perspective that even though in your darkest days or you may think it's dark, literally, you know, I was figgeredly in the dark right, even at night, there are stars that shine and it may be dark, but the sun will always rise. And I think if you have that many people's confidence and if you don't, HMM, it's the saddest thing that you don't have to feeling. And I I want to do that. People consuming to make that change, were to affect somebody in that way that, even though it's so small, like they're little things, that they did so and so massive and yet to somebody like you and I putting their foot in the Cape. You like what it is able to...

...get dressed by themselves. It's a huge or to be able to pick up something and eat it right that they've been working on the little feet. I feel like need you know what I means, what I positive. So yeah, no, I totally agree. Like, I think we can kind of take things for granted, you know, like you know, like a like we said, like you know, I vision and our hearing and the little things that we have until, like you said, sometimes things happen. It gives you a perspective and, you know, hearing your story, you know, it's really positive and like your sail if, and that's one of the most important things is, you know, being positive and power that we possess us, you know, not people and our energy on the way we think, and I think you know it's we move with the powert you know, he los sews. I've been way. Yeah, I actually agree that you said. I just think being what your legacy is and what your intention is to now that I have children, I think what people think of you and like bringing outside looking in, like what people think of me sometimes, and it's not from the same point of view. You wonder like how can I improve myself or what I think sometimes my biggest challenge I feel misunderstood or if that, so many ideas in your head, but you can't articulate it to somebody so they can understand it and you bring value to them. You know, because you're mind it comes out the way you wanted to, but when you speak it doesn't. You don't articulate it. And I think sometimes with the state of the world who have going on right now, sometimes people are just figuratively ignorant right they don't know what to say or or they're just too narrow mind it that they don't have the words and at the perspective to share that. You know, and that's said. You know what part of the debate? You know, having a debate with you know we may come from two different places is but we can have opinions right and agree to disagree on those things, but it's how we articulate that and bring and draw people into our conversation, to educate people, especially our children. Yeah, especially important. I'm a fame cl people. People don't set their own views as sorry, they so closed open. How they think and how they feel is that, you know, they don't they're not mindful, they can't set their attention aside from themselves. Yeah, that's so true. Like you say, mindfulness, and you know that I said I meditate and that that's what helps me. I really think, to have a comment that to attract those things and you really think about what it is that you want to stack in your life, he space in your life. So I really hope. I think I brought people a sense of something that they didn't know before or another technique and other positive technique that they can take time out of. Because when you meditate, I feel like it's quality, person quantity, and sometimes it's really tense for people, right they feel like they have to do a certain amount of time, but I think it's as long as you if you have five minutes, make it a really good quality side right, that you're going to calm yourself of dedicate that time at an increase of site, that self love, that self healing, you know, take for yourself self care, you know. Yeah, so I cletely agree. I think you know, it's not self loving, it's not, you know, being mindful and you know understanding...

...that we all people will connected, who got our own views, will got our own opinions and, you know, regardless of what color skin is or where we're from, with still human beings at the end of the day. Yeah, and I can't, like I said, it almost makes me cringe. I mean it literally makes me cringe, but I can't imagine seeing at the front of my own eye. You know, you see it on TV and you're just like, my God, these are human beings and these are people and I just I don't know, I just my heart is so heavy, you know, with that and I truly hope this is just not a week, you know, a one week movement. It has to be something that you are and, like you say, mindful and walk with intention every day, every second. You know. Yeah, no, I think I think it will blow over. I think it's I think with the current situation as well. I think it's always been like a capitalist because people who already been under pressure for Marthon and then this not that done, that event happened and it's just kind of spread really. I mean we had proach, we've a protests in London and there's been actually, you know, we're all that there's a few protests and quite a few frock thoughts broke out, especially because a lot of people, yeah, sometimes needs to be address and I think people just need it. needs to kind of be like a wake up calling somewhere. People need to be kind, you know. Yeah, definitely, and I think to be this thing. Do the right thing when nobody's looking, right. I don't need to accolate to say that I donate things, that I give money or, you know, way my own flags. That's what it's about. You the right thing with nobody's looking, and you don't need that phrase. You should do it because it's what you need to do and it's the right thing to do and it's what you want to you know what I mean, in life, and I think it's so important. Just like those pots didn't do anything, you know what I mean. How do you stand back and just watch that happen? It's like, you know, watching somebody get their ass kids. I'm all about a good fight, you know what I mean? Ten on one, if you want to, drop it and we'll go tottel, let's bring it, you know what I mean? Yeah, but got to be fit. You know what it says. Yeah, I'll, I'll kick your ass either way. But I want to be kind. I want to show we can have a conversation and you don't need to do that and you have, but it has to be there. And sometimes, and I hate to say it, sometimes people learn with physical pain, and I hate to say that, but, and you know what I mean, to show them that you have to squash out that negativity or there's somebody you know, bigger than you, that you know it's going to tell you like being a parent. You know it's like sometimes being a parent. It's not. It's not fun. You know what I mean. But have to do it. I'm not your friends. I'm study. What I want that you have the skills to navigate your life, go out into the world at present and be kind. I didn't do that. I'm not. Yeah, it's not. So, no, I adree. I think it's not balances in the I mean you got to look after yourself by whatever means. For Yeah, it's not. It's our balance is like, you know, I'm going to be kind, but you know it's how fair? You always that, like you said. I mean ten on one, is it fair? Free on one? Is it? For you know, if you if you want to have a class for somebody. It's going to be fair. The balance isn't made with open yeah, and I think there's a balance between what you put in your mind right what you're listening and there's such a...

...thing in art. I don't know about in London, but you know, everybody is so negative on trump. Right. So, as a country, though he is a president, it's like, you know, I don't want any white. I am white. He is our president. We can't it's black and white, and to see him fail is to see US fail. Yeah, right, and they're so and are so hell on feels instead of it's like almost like I'm trying to sell you something you don't mean. I just wanted to vote what you know? It's in front of me, so I can make an educated guests. But when you have all these smoking mirrors and you really don't know the fact because you're not political, you know what I mean. But you want to educate yourself, you got to get out there and vote and do certain things educate yourself. But here it seems like people it's so negative and if you want to change, you can't go about it the way we've been going about it. You have to do and get in bold and vote and the apartment. That's the only way are going to you know, yeah, you've got to make up your own line. Hoving you the thing quite I'm not. I watch the news and politics. I'm not heavily into politics, but I think you've got to got a very different system to like how it works in the UK and, like you said, you have to really get involved. I mean in the UK you'll get involved in politics as well. Like I said, you got persons in control. You call anyway. You can probably change as by votes and but you know, yea worth putting your you energy into something that you can really change over them for your vote. That's exactly right and that's what we try try to tell the kids sometimes. You know, when you put negative energy into something you're not you can't expect to get positive energy out right. You have to be able to facilitate in a positive way, where you have credibility, where you can educate yourself and have a conversation with people and sounds like you know what you're talking about, not saying like, Oh, you're full of Shit, I don't believe you. Whatever, you don't agree with me. So you know, let's it's it's just fascinating to me how many, how many conversations go like that? Instead of really it's almost should feel good to be like no, I heard this, what do you think about this? You know, mean, what's your opinion on this? And then it's almost like ah, that's a different perspective. You know, there was there was a woman. She told me a story. She was on instagram and she was an African American woman and she was getting an award at this big time events that she was going to and she had to travel to this place and she broken nail and she had she was speaking because she was folding microphone and that she needed to get to fix. Luckily, with the afternoon, she said that she got on the elevator and that an older white couple got on sick. Good morning, how are you? A white woman got on good morning. So everybody had got on said Good Morning and interacted with her except for the last older like get these ets couples right. So the elevator stopped and the older man, the last one I got on, said ladies first. So the two white women got back, you know, got off first, and so he didn't clear the path because she was the first one to get on. Remember the African Americans. So she went to go and he had an umbrella in his hands and he said, I said, you like Tafter with it? He said. I said ladies first, and nobody said a word on that elevator. But yet they all had conversations with her. Good...

...morning, how are you? You know what I mean, prior to the incident, but when she needed to support the most, and this is nine months ago, nobody said a word. So here she is, affluent, educated, getting an award, and yet two seconds of her life just put her down. You mean, and that most but me, no, we have had that experience about things. You know what I mean, remember, but not everybody is treated a thing, and I think that's what we have to really enlighten ourselves with. You know what I mean. People carry things around with them and they don't make them anybody else's problems, right, but it's they still take it all the time, and I think that leveling over and and what kind of person you are and how you can navigate through that. Or if you just had enough, you know what I mean, and you want it to stop. I can't imagine what that feels like. You know, I've never experienced people who, you know, think can believe thought way, you know, people can be liked. I mean I think you know, what you give out you get back. Yes, I totally agree. You know, what'll goes around comes around, and you know what end did you? You put out into the world. You know that's going to come back to you. Definitely. Yeah, I agree, and I think too, if we think about it, you never know who's watching right and you never know the walk around the corner, and I think that's so important. That's yourself almost like getting caught when you're doing something bad, you know what I mean? So they'll sep it, you still do it. It's just such a waste of energy and so extra, you know. Yeah, so that's my mantra. You know, walk with love and wellness, because we are all going through something and you never know what a hello, a hug, a smile or you know, funny you know, can do for something. It want of working with the kids, it's the little things that kids love and felt a way that I can connect the kids is I make them raceless, like I make them a little tiny way and when I see them come through the market with their parents and they say excuse me, or there's a boot next to me, and up they thank you. It's like a Saymp all, you know, like a smoothie day all or a piece of cookie, and they say thank you about anybody saying anything. I have these three made graceless just to fit, you know, to all the way up Qui, seven, eight guy, you know, and I give them out for free and the parents face and their face and it's such a small token, like but it's not their parents catching them saying thank you to me. And that's the difference between showing people right from the outside that their parents are getting rewarded because they taught their child down. You don't mean that it's a positive thing, but somebody else is rewarding them besides their parents, right, and so extends. That's a joy to see their faces and so cute, because I will never have a child bracelet right that I don't want, that you don't need, because because they won't get it back. You know. They don't understand that, you know, and so the parents aren't oh no, I can't, and so I always ask them. I give her, give her race, because I don't want them to think that at any way. I want to charge them for it, but it's been a really cool experience and just something special, you know, what to be between being then I can't wait to get back to doing that and catching, you know, those little moments, you know, and it's so great because they come back and a couple girls that are local, you know, they're like,...

I don't know, five or six, they'll come back and say, okay, I'm ready for my pink one or my blue one last, different colors. Yeah, or or they'll come by and they'll do something, you know, special. They thank you, Hig you know. So it's really cute. It's a great connection, you know, with my community, and so I think that's really you know. So I think it's amazing and really nice and positive and inspiring what you're doing, you know, with we making these bracelets, on the connection from the bracelets to, you know, what you went through. You're doing. You know, you're doing something that you're passionate about. You can do something Nice, you know, food, being creative and making these bracelets, giving it to people, and you're you're insparring, you know, story behind it as well. Yeah, and I think it's a it's something within my wheelhouse that I can do write that they they go to the farmers market and sometimes, like me, fix ninety five to buy the keys this movie. Right, I only have specific amount of money that I can go to and when you go to places like that, like Disneyland, or just because you can get into a place doesn't mean that you could have afford certain things, and so sometimes just those pros and that'll be the one thing that they get. You know what I mean? Or so to me, it's those kind of moments where they may not have gotten anything at the market because their parents can afford it. You know what means? It's a positive message in there with them that, no matter where they are. You know I mean that, that they that they are special. You know that, we know that. We see so kind of thing, and I think that's so important, especially with little kids. You know what I mean. They don't know until he show them, you know. So, yeah, even though I'm working so much now, it's I am really happy, you know. Yeah, no, I feel I think you know, you're ye from where you was at some point in your life where you couldn't see on all these things will happening. The almost seem like there was no way out, you know, like you. Yeah, you push through that and you go through the the events that unfolded. You know, it's faith, isn't it? In some ways, fates, and it's, you know, it's had who comes to your path when you're in those dark moments and you're by yourself and you're it's almost like I wanted to see the kids see me upset. For that I was passionate where I was scared, because all those emotions were authentic. But at the same time, no matter what's going on, we had each other, you know what I mean? And when I was what I was going through, I wanted to keep two things the same, my house and where they went to school. If I could keep those two things consistent, I felt like they had that stability. And I did that and I was so proud to do that, and it's I've had people come back and say, wow, I really thank you for sharing your story with me, because it taught me perspective and it taught me that everybody's situation is different. When you look around and you are waiting for somebody to be like, whoe with me, you have the power to do that, whether it's just thinking positive or changing process, simple as that. It's to get aditary things, to mean to what's in your power and take on little things. I remember when I first started, I was diagnosed with Adhd and I...

...what happened is that you have this list in your mind, right what you need to do, and I was unsuccessful because my list was too long. I was never going to be successful at it. And so they, you know, they want to throw medicine at and they want to throw all this stuff and let me find to be able to make a small list the kids, making yourself successful, right, and so I did that and it worked and I was so thankful. Instead of like one was when I was going through surgeries, one was just taking a shower, thanks getting dress and, before you know, me being present and not in the same position when my kids came home, because they don't know what you've done all day and they say you left, they left you on the couch and you're still there, you know. So we was trying to change the positions and getting dressed and doing little things that was within my control. So would set me up for success and it works and I'm, like I said, to me, I'm so proud. Like you say, I'm on the other end of it and if I can help one person who is in the dark literally, I say keep going. Why? At a time, reach out people know that you're not alone, know that somebody cares about you, they love you and you may feel all about it, but you're not. You know what I mean, and I think those are the moment you never know when somebody's going to go through your feed, go through a pictures, that file or flow. Yeah, just the humans at a completely agree and I think, you know, what you're doing is, you know, really, really inspiring and I think it's really lovely because you know, you're having an impact on other people in a positive way and providing value tovers, I think, for your story and, you know, really make people think, to be grateful for where they are, they have and to never give up. You know, there's yeah, it's very true. Yeah, sorry, but yeah, Nice. It's really appreciate you sharing your story and talking about what happened, because I think, you know, a lot of people need to hear it and I think it will help people, you know, with what they might be going through. Yeah, so for you to give me this platform to be able to talk to you, and it's, like I said, happens so organically, and so I really appreciate being patient and I get that normally everything you know and like that, but that was the moment where happened. You're like, wow, it's fun. You Welcome. Ye, awesome. Well, I will resout to you and I would love to make you and I would just love to send that to you. So I really am so brain. No, you're very welcome. I loved. I'll be really nice, awesome. Will come to you and I'll ask you. You know, you're healing property of your monsters and things like that, and I will definitely make accustomed to you. Yeah, why funk? You funk. You really appreciate it. But yeah, yeah, I look forward to you. Take care of a great day. All the best will you're doing. Thank you. To Buy.

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